Wake Up

When I feel overwhelmed, I tend to disassociate. I tend to disconnect from the world around me. Be it through Netflix, extra exercise, or cleaning my house, I tend to pull away from the very real, very big problems in my life and either completely ignore them or focus on much smaller, unrelated issues. Anyone who has lived with an anxiety disorder has probably experienced a similar phenomenon.

In the short term, this feels like a great coping mechanism, because it distracts me from my stressors, and I feel temporarily less anxious. However, this has always harmed me in the long run.

When my Netflix show has ended, my body is too exhausted to work out more, and my house is completely spotless, my very big problems are still there waiting, and they’re often bigger than before. 

And sometimes, an even more troubling side effect pops up from this coping mechanism: I become numb to my real problems. I free fall into a pit of apathy, with the help of one more episode, one more rep, and one more space to tidy up. All while these larger issues, often with very real people attached to them needing my attention, are still there, waiting. 

Right now, I think our world is resting in this pit of apathy, brought on by feeling overwhelmed by a lot of very real crises. And, right now, it’s the Haitian people who are suffering because of our apathy and silence. 

Those of you who follow me on social media, specifically on Instagram, have probably seen me posting a lot of content regarding the ongoing issues in Haiti. There is a lack of fuel, which has resulted in black market fuel being sold for exuberant prices (I’m talking $30 + for a gallon of gasoline). In a country without regulated electricity, many people rely on generators for power, making gas essential for everyday function in businesses, schools, and hospitals – not to mention needing gas and diesel for transportation. The fuel crisis has had a domino effect, causing the cost of living in Haiti to be four to five times what it was at the beginning of 2022. All the while, the majority of Haitians are still being paid an average of $5 each day. On top of this, gang violence continues to affect the entire country. It used to be seen as a problem only in Port-Au-Prince… that simply isn’t true anymore. Practically every community has been touched by gang violence and kidnapping. Practically every community has felt the paralyzing terror of automatic gunfire ringing out suddenly – where they are praying it’s a police operation being successfully carried out, but it is more often a gang take over of the area. The violence being committed against the Haitian people is horrific; it’s more disturbing to know that it is being funded by prominent bureaucrats and politicians. And, as if all this wasn’t enough, the country still doesn’t have a functioning government. It has been over a year since Jovenel Moise, Haiti’ former president, was assassinated in his home.

The de facto Prime Minister, Ariel Henry, is “in charge” for now – a man who himself is suspected of involvement in Jovenel’s assassination. He rules the country with detachment; he has only addressed the country twice since his installment, both times within the last month – the first time was to announce an official increase in fuel prices at gas stations. This address came after almost six weeks of only black market gas availability and the crazy high gas prices that came along with black market gas. This announcement pushed the Haitian people over the edge, and started this “peyi lok” (country lock down) that we are seeing now – weeks of protests and road blocks. His second address came a few days into peyi lok, where he essentially told the Haitian people they needed to calm down, and accused everyone protesting of belonging to the various gangs. This, of course, only fueled the anger of the Haitian People, resulting in more intense protesting, and more roadblocks.

Which brings us to where we are now – a countrywide lock down, leaving many people without food or water. There is still no gas, and one of the country’s most prominent gangs is now holding the fuel that is in the country hostage. Hospitals are closing. School can’t open. And Prime Minister Henry has fallen back into his apathetic, and frankly criminal, silence. 

I have lived in Haiti for four years. I have seen a lot of things here. I’m not immune to brushes with gangs, or lock downs, or intense and uncomfortable situations. But I can tell you with certainty, I have never seen the situation as dark as it is right now. 

I’ve shared with many people in America the stories and the layout I shared above. What is breaking my heart, and honestly angering me, is the apathy that I’ve seen towards the situation. I’m met with shoulder shrugs, and often a “Yes, the whole world is struggling right now. Look at what’s happening in -”, and countries like the Ukraine, Puerto Rico, and even the United States itself are listed off. I’m then promptly reminded that Haiti has “always” been a country with problems, and my friends try to steer the conversation off of Haiti and on to these other issues, particularly the inflation or political disagreements in America. 

Friends, I say this with love – I know the world as a whole has a lot of problems. I know there are some truly concerning issues happening almost anywhere you go. And yes, I know that inflation in America is putting a strain on people, and there are some political situations here that have truly upset different people groups. But, what is happening in Haiti is an egregious humanitarian crisis. Innocent people are dying everyday, including women and children. The country is completely strangled and no institutions are functioning normally, from the government all the way down to schooling. Yes, inflation is problematic in America. But people are dying trying to carry out daily tasks in Haiti, and there are no government programs in place to provide them relief, there is no one listening to their cries for help.

We have to care about what’s happening in Haiti, and we must start caring as if peoples’ lives depend on it – because they do. 

When I find myself in a pit of apathy, feeling numb and blinded to the real issues that need my attention, I remember that I have a Savior to lean on when the problem seems too big. He is the source of my strength, and He is Mighty enough to tackle any problem. He also cares deeply for all who are suffering. Yes, He sees those struggling in America to afford what they need because of inflation. He sees the damage the hurricane left in Puerto Rico. And He sees the devastation and inhumanity happening in the Ukraine. 

He also sees his children in Haiti being brutalized by violence. And I think He’s heartbroken, because we’re turning our backs on them as they suffer. 

Friends, today I ask you, pray with me that apathy doesn’t take over our hearts. Pray for the leaders of our own country, for the Prime Minister in Haiti, and for those sitting on the UN’s council. And finally, ask God to open your own heart, and allow you to be moved for our brothers and sisters in Haiti.

Father God, we come before you humbled, repenting where we lack in love and concern for the people in Haiti, those who were also created in Your image. We know your heart breaks for them, as you hear their cries through the relentless pain and suffering. Lord, stir the hearts of political leaders who have the power to intervene. Father, break their hearts for what we know breaks yours. Move them, so that they move for the Haitian people. We ask that You break our hearts too, knowing that You’re with us through the tears and sadness, knowing that You are with our Haitian friends. Father, it us safe for us to feel heartache with You, because we can trust that You see our tears, and we believe that when you hear our cries You are moved to act. Father, wake us up.